“When pigs fly”. That’s an expression that I get more often now that I have two little gentlemen to look after. Now I must add a disclaimer that back in the day when having kids was just an idea my wife was very gracious in giving me my boys’ nights and even boys’ weekends out. That was then and this is now.
Now I need to sit by the window and wish that one day a pig will fly by. That being said there are these glorious instances in time when the Gods and Goddesses of Fertility and Childhood will shine upon me and grant “the unexpected fantasy turned reality”. I firmly believe that I’m not alone in this phenomenon and other fathers can relate to this unbelievable realty that falls upon me.
It can be a small little thing like your wife just feeling sorry for you and your pathetic life. When its this bad she is more than happy to kick you out of the house to have a beer with a buddy and complain about life. You think she is doing you a favour but she just doesn’t want to see your tired, sad and broken face anymore. Either way to take it and run.
Other times you get “the freaky incident”. In my case the condo we live in was doing some hallway renovations. The chemicals they were using were quite toxic and it was not recommended that children should stay in the unit for the night. My wife decided to stay with the kids at my in laws. There was no room for me which meant a free night all to myself. Yes I had to breathe in some bad chemicals but I got to watch a two hour action movie uninterrupted. As far as I’m concerned that is a victory!
The very odd time you get that “pig flying” moment. It is very rare but when it comes you take it and enjoy every second of it. Don’t feel guilty because you have earned this magical time and believe me it ends in the blink of an eye. It could be a best friends’ weekend stag or maybe your wife has to go away for a week long seminar and decides to take the kids and in laws with her. It is a pinch yourself moment where you really can’t believe it is happening.
My moment came when my longest friend decided to get married in an all inclusive resort in Costa Rica. My wife and I were very excited to go with the kids for 5 days of fun in the sun. Out of no where my wife decided that it would be too costly and she didn’t want to leave the kids alone with the in laws for five days if we went together so maybe I should go alone and spend some quality time with my longest running group of friends.
Who am I to disappoint anyone. Of course I could make the “sacrifice” to go to Costa Rica and be the lone family representative for the wedding. Needless to say I did not disappoint. I ate and drank everything that was offered to me, I hung out by the pool and plunged into the beautiful ocean, I got my first pedicure (which is more painful than I thought it would be) and had a nice deep tissue massage, I slept like a boss and even Mc’d the wedding.
Did I miss everyone? Everyday I did. By the end I wanted to come home. I missed all of our great times together. I would get over it by my third beer in the hot tub though.
Sometimes you need these me moments and this one was mine all mine. I came back from that trip re-energized and invigorated. I jumped into family life like a kid in a ball pit. I missed them and loved them. The absolute best moment of that trip was coming home, walking through my door and have two kids drop everything and run to me as fast as they could, to give me the biggest hugs and kisses ever screaming “what did you get me? what did you get me?” I was thrown right back into family action and couldn’t be happier.
The time will come again where I must venture out alone. I will be ready to take on the mission.
Father Fables Introduction 