In one of my earlier posts I wrote about the odd miracle that happens when you can get a free hallway pass due to a celebration where you just can’t say no. In this case a relatively new phenomenon called the “Dadchelor Party” is the newest miracle for Dads. In fact I’m sure us Dads created the Dadchelor party (who else would).
A Dadchelor party is planned for a future father whose wife/or surrogate mother is very close to her due date. The idea is to give the future father one last hurrah before he becomes a father for the first time. It could be a one night affair or could last a entire weekend if you’re lucky.
Dadchelor parties do not come up very often. In fact they can be quite controversial. Its very difficult to go up to your partner and say “Hi honey the boys want to take me out and get me all liquored up one last time before the baby comes, Can I go?” In fact when I read that sentence I must say I must have had balls of steel to ask my wife this question. Now I realize just how lucky I was.
Throughout my life I have been to two Dadchelor parties (not counting my own). The most recent one was fantastic. In order to get into the story I need to digress. When I was young and childless; myself along with a group of my closest friends would venture to Montreal every year for a boys weekend. We would hit the nightclubs, eat loads of late night poutine and smoked meat sandwiches and religiously attend an electronic music festival called “Piqnique Electronique”every Sunday afternoon.
Piqnique Electronique was always the apex of our weekend. The music was always bumping, the people always friendly and many new friendships were created. There was one Piqnique in particular that will always never be beaten. We were well into the festival, having the time of our lives and enjoying copious amounts of alcohol and other substances when someone came up to me and said “Hi, its my birthday!” I replied I love birthdays and proceeded to buy him a birthday beer. My new friend along with his party crew all had great spirit and instantly fit in with my group. We didn’t stop dancing, laughing and drinking all night but then we heard thunder in the distance followed by an enormous white flash in the night sky.
The storm came upon us with fast fury but we didn’t care. The rain poured down on us, thunder crashing, lightning flashing but we just kept on dancing. We were cleansed while dancing to our favourite beats. We reached up to the skies and taunted the rain to come down harder, faster and it obliged. The DJS kept playing for as long as they could until the promoters of Piqnique told them to shut it down. We wouldn’t leave and chanted and clapped “Encore!” clap, clap clap; Encore clap, clap, clap” We also sang in glorious harmony “Ole, Ole, Ole,Ole……..Ole,Ole. The chanting and singing continued while the downpour kept coming. A miracle then happened; maybe it was our singing to the festival Gods; or we just got lucky but the rains started to dissipate and the storm was moving on. We were soaking wet and probably stunk like wet shaggy dogs but we were all united in one mission. Keep the party going.
At long last the DJ stepped into the DJ booth, turned on his microphone and proclaimed to the masses “You are all fucking crazy”. He then proceeded to play “Groove is in the Heart” by Delight. Needless to say the song took us all by surprise but we loved it. The festival continued for a while longer and officially ended an hour later than it should have but our night was not over.
Our new friend Jean Phillipe took us on a wild tour of the city that I could never duplicate or even figure out where to start. We danced in a castle, ate the best poutine I have ever had and (probably ever will have), and ended our early morning at a gay nightclub in the gay district. The club had an amazing DJ that took us on a musical adventure to another dimension. By the time we stumbled out the club the sun blasted us with glorious heat and light. It was then I realized that I had a flight to catch back home in two hours. Luckily I made the flight and more importantly my friendship and adventures with Jean Phillipe continued.
We have grown up and matured slightly since our first encounter and when he exclaimed that he and his partner were going to be parents for the first time I was ecstatic for both of them. While my wife and I were at the baby shower someone asked if he had one more thing he could do before the baby came what would it be? He answered that he would love to do one more Piqnique. My brain sizzled. This is a perfect opportunity to have a Dadchelor party for Jean-Phillipe.
After explaining the idea he loved it. His partner also agreed that this was a great idea. Jean Phillipe was going to be attending a wedding in Montreal on the weekend we agreed upon so it was perfect. Three weeks later our plan came to fruition. The Piqnique Electronique festival was much larger than when we went but the vibe was the exact same. Everyone was very friendly and the music was perfect. We danced, pranced and drank to no end.
There were times where I could sense the panic in Jean-Phillipe but I was able to let him know what a wonderful gift it is to be a father. The joys he will experience when holding his little one for the first time. The undying dedication and love you will feel with this wonderful gift he will receive. I told him how your life dramatically changes and nothing else will matter except your children. Oh yes my friend there will be challenge after challenge but he will teach his child to learn from his mistakes. I told him he is going to be a fantastic Dad and gave him a big hug. We then continued to dance and drink long into the night.
Our night ended sitting on a bench by the St. Lawrence river overlooking the bright, welcoming cityscape of Montreal. We were reminiscing about our adventures and laughing uncontrollably. It was such a deep gut wrenching laugh that came deep from within and it felt fantastic to laugh like that again. It made me ponder to myself. Is this the laugh that children experience almost daily? When did I lose this wonderful feeling or has my childhood laughter always been buried within me.
My deep thoughts were suddenly interrupted when Jean Phillipe broke into song. He started to sing “Life is But a Dream”. His voice was beautiful and it was a perfect reflection of how life is when you have children. We all started singing together and it made us all feel alive. Four parents and one future parent singing together in harmony. It was a Dadchelor Party I will never forget. When ever I feel a little down in the dumps I will replay my recording of that night on the docks with all of us singing and remember just how great life can be.
Jean Phillipe had a beautiful, healthy baby girl and just like I predicted he is a fantastic, loving father. In fact he is doing so well that there is already talk of baby number two. Who knows what adventures he will have between now and then. I just hope I will be a part of them.
Father Fables Introduction 